A Wallflower at the Highland Court: A Slow Burn Highlander Romance Read online

  “Then stop and talk to me.”

  “I told you, I can’t. I must hurry and change if I’m to join the queen on her walk. If I arrive late, it will be obvious, and then I’ll need to either lie or explain. Neither of which are appealing.” Maude turned away, but paused and looked back. “You may whisper to me, but apparently your voice carries when you speak to your sister. It carries straight to the queen.”

  Kieran’s eyes flashed wide before regret filled them and his shoulders slumped. He looked like a guilty child being remonstrated by an adult.

  “I’m sorry, Maude. You warned me not to say aught, and I insisted I knew better when you’re the one who survives her at court while I just visit. How much worse have I made it?”

  “Significantly.”

  Kieran was unprepared for the flat and succinct response. He looked at his feet as he tried to come up with something else to say. Maude took it to signal the end of their conversation.

  “But how will you get out of your gown?” Maude spun around with such haste that her skirts twirled out before settling against her legs. “Bluidy hell. I didn’t mean it as it sounded. I mean, I wasn’t offering. Unless--- No. I meant should I fetch your maid?”

  “I can manage on my own.” Maude turned away once again. “But thank you.”

  Kieran had little choice but to watch her walk away. Unless he wanted to jeopardize her reputation, there was no way for him to follow her any further. And unless he wanted to jeopardize the little self-restraint he possessed at the moment, he had to let her go. He hadn’t intended to imply that he would help her undress until the image took shape in his mind. By the time he finished stumbling over his words, that was precisely what he wanted.

  Chapter Four

  Maude spent the rest of the morning avoiding both friend and foe. She arrived in the gardens as the women set off, easing her way into the center of the group with her sister and best friend. Several women strolled on each side, and her new nemesis trailed after the queen at the front of the pack. She kept her cowl over her head, the wind brisker than it had been the day before. After their constitutional, she accompanied the others to the queen’s solar, where she found the book on medicinals she’d been reading for several days. Blair and Arabella accepted that she wanted to be left alone, so they found other friends to sit with. She situated herself where no one else might sit near her, but if anyone approached, the queen would notice.

  The queen and her ladies remained in the solar until the noon meal. Maude slipped away to her chamber until she was certain the meal concluded. She lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling for most of the time. Though tired, she didn’t dare fall asleep, lest she nap the afternoon away. The morning and the night before had drained her.

  Upon leaving her chamber, Maude traversed the passageways until she reached the Great Hall, where she peeked through the open doorway and spied the queen rising. Her timing had been perfect. She slipped along the wall until she reached the group of ladies who congregated around the queen. Certain she went unnoticed, she failed to prepare for the queen to look at her with an assessing gaze.

  “Lady Maude, I believe you planned to spend the afternoon at Cambuskenneth Abbey to collect more herbs and medicinals for the castle’s spense. They informed me this morning that it looks a wee sparse. We aren’t yet past the ill season, so I appreciate your assistance. Be sure to take guards.”

  “Yes, Your Grace.” Maude dipped into a deep curtsy and would have liked to hug the woman if it wouldn’t have resulted in a furor. She recognized that the queen had taken pity on her. Maude had been to the monastery only a fortnight ago, but between what she overheard of Kieran and Madeline’s conversation and what she’d most likely been informed of the morning meal, the queen had offered Maude a reprieve.

  Maude wove through the castle until she came to the undercroft where the spense was located. A large storage room of sorts, it was where they kept herbs and medicinals that needed hanging and drying. An aging monk from Cambuskenneth Abbey served as spenser. He was patient and gracious with Maude, who had shown a natural talent for healing since she was a young girl. She found the sick rarely cared what she looked like if she made them feel better. The monk had taught her a great deal since her arrival a few months prior, and she enjoyed her time with him. Going blind, he relied on her for help. The monk also took no interest in her appearance since he barely saw in the dark storeroom, and he was a man of the cloth. When she pushed the door open, she found the chamber empty, so she gathered two large baskets and made her way to the garrison. Since neither of her parents were in residence, only two Sutherland guards remained at Stirling. She breathed a sigh of relief when she recognized one of her father’s men walking toward the barracks’ door.

  “Donald,” she called out to him. She would send him to search for Tomas instead of having to find another man to assist her. She became uncomfortable around too many guardsmen when there was no one else with her.

  “Aye, ma lady.”

  “I’m riding out to the abbey. Could you and Tomas please escort me?”

  “Aye, ma lady.” While neither man was old enough to be her father, they’d known her since she was a wean, and they were two of the few men her father entrusted with his daughters’ safety.

  “I’ll be in the stables readying Trioblaid.” Her horse’s name, Trouble, still made Donald laugh. She’d named the gelding Trouble because within hours of being born, he wandered out of the birthing stall and tried to enter a pasture where his father, an enormous stallion, was exercising. The colt toddled over to his father on gangly legs and tried to whinny. It sounded like a smothered trumpet. The stallion’s eyes rolled before he charged at the newborn. Lachlan had only moments to restrain his mount before the horse charged at his own son. A fortnight later, the colt proved to be an escape artist once more. He ambled out of his stall and away from his mother and discovered a barrel of apples. Maude found him with his head down to his withers as he chomped on the fruit. It was one of her early healing experiences, since the horse gave himself colic. His temper rivaled his father’s when he was a few years old, and Maude’s father insisted they geld him before he broke down any more walls to the stable. His powerful legs were his favorite tool to display his anger. Maude was one of the few people who had the ability to control him before his gelding. While no one would describe him as docile now, he was manageable. She guided him out of his stall once she’d saddled him and stood in the bright sunlight of the bailey while she awaited her guards. The sun was warmer than it had been that morning.

  “Good afternoon, my lady.”

  Maude knew who possessed the warm baritone coming from over her shoulder. She continued to stroke Trioblaid’s neck but glanced at Kieran.

  “Good afternoon, Laird.”

  Kieran frowned. He was unsure why at first, but he realized he didn’t care for Maude using his title. He would have rather it had been his name, and before he could stop himself, he said as much.

  “It’s Kieran to you, lass.” Just as he had that morning, he kept his tone low. Maude rewarded him with a pretty blush that spread across her cheeks.

  “I can’t call you that. Laird.”

  Kieran grinned as Maude tacked his title on as an afterthought.

  “You can if you want.”

  Maude seemed to size him up, and Kieran had a moment of panic that he would be found lacking.

  “What I want isn’t of consequence, Laird MacLeod.”

  “Nay, lass. You’re going in the wrong direction. I don’t want my full title from you, Maude.”

  “Are ye ready, ma lady?” Maude was relieved to hear the burr of Donald’s voice. It excused her from the awkward conversation spiraling beyond her control. She suspected Kieran flirted with her, and she was ill equipped for such banter.

  “Aye.”

  “Where are you going?” Kieran’s brow furrowed as he assessed the two men who would accompany Maude to wherever she ventured.

  “Cambuskenneth Abbey fo
r the afternoon. I need to collect some herbs and medicinals for the castle.”

  “Really?”

  “Really.” Maude gathered her reins, prepared to mount when a large hand covered hers.

  “You’re only taking two guards?” Kieran’s breath feathered across her ear, and when she turned to peer at him, she was certain he was close enough to kiss her.

  “That’s how many I always travel with in Stirling.” She was proud that her voice didn’t sound as breathy as it felt. “I’ve been to the abbey many times since moving to court. It’s not a long ride. I could be halfway there by now.”

  “Cheeky, buttercup.” Both froze as Kieran used the endearment for a second time in less than a day.

  “Why do you call me that?” Maude whispered.

  “I’m not sure. I’ve called no one else that, but it seems to fit you. You appear fragile, but you’re stronger than most give you credit for. And there’s a wildness to you, as though you wish to be free of all these trappings,” he waved his hand toward the castle. “And simply allowed to roam free.”

  “What Highlander wouldn’t want to be free of this?” Maude didn’t glance away as her brown eyes bored into his. “I’m not wild. I’m just not cut out to be a courtier.”

  Kieran leaned closer, just as he had the night before. “I suspect you can be wild if given the opportunity. Would that I could be there for it.”

  Maude blinked several times and started when the clatter of another set of hooves approached. A stable boy brought out an enormous bay horse. Its chestnut coat gleamed in the sun as it knickered at the sight of Kieran.

  “Where are you going?” Maude hoped to change the topic of conversation.

  “With you.”

  “What?” Maude looked around and shook her head. “Where were you planning to go? I doubt it’s to Cambuskenneth.”

  “It wasn’t. I planned to retire to my chamber, but I’m not letting you leave with only two guards.” Before Maude protested, large warm hands grasped her waist and hoisted her with ease into her saddle. She arranged herself, embarrassed at how her stockings showed while she rode astride. It hadn’t mattered to her when she planned to travel with her family’s guardsmen, but now she felt exposed. Kieran didn’t help matters when his palm brushed against her calf. The gleam in his eye told her it wasn’t an accident. She watched as he vaulted into the saddle of a horse she never saw or heard him summon.

  She nudged Trioblaid, and the four riders set off. Her guards attempted to flank her, but Kieran refused to relinquish his spot on her right. Donald rode in front while Tomas rode in the rear.

  “See.” Kieran gestured to the left. “Not enough guards. You have a vulnerable side. There is no one to your left. Where are your other guards?”

  “I don’t have any others, and I don’t appreciate you insinuating that Donald and Tomas can’t protect me. They have been guardsmen my entire life. They’ve kept me safe on more than one occasion. You aren’t the only Highlander who can wield a sword.”

  “I ken that.” Maude liked how Kieran’s brogue sometimes appeared, even when he tried to hide his accent. “I saw them in the lists this morning. It’s the only reason I didn’t insist on bringing some of my own men.”

  “I should ask my brother if high-handedness is bred into every laird or if it’s something that’s taught to heirs.”

  Kieran’s chuckle was deep and made her toes curl in her boots. He steered his horse a little closer to hers, but Trioblaid shied away before baring his teeth.

  “That’s why I don’t need more guards. I don’t think Trioblaid cares for you getting too close.”

  “Apt name apparently. In truth, you think your horse is more sufficient than one of my warriors?”

  Maude smirked at him before whistling. Donald moved aside, and Trioblaid shot forward. She leaned low over his neck and squeezed her thighs against his flanks. She let Trioblaid gallop for a few minutes, giving him his head, before she reined in and swung him around.

  “Do keep up! I’d like to be home before the sun sets!” She called out to Kieran. Her guards already knew what she and her horse were capable of. It was one reason her father remained comfortable with only two guards to accompany his daughters. Blair’s horse had the same lineage and was just as fast as Trioblaid, even though he was two years younger. Both horses were faster than any except for their father who belonged to Maude’s brother. She pulled the rein and turned Trioblaid to face the direction in which they traveled. She waited until Kieran was almost abreast before she spurred her horse again. By the time they arrived at the gates of the monastery, both horses and riders were winded.

  * * *

  Kieran wasn’t sure if he wanted to haul Maude off her horse and kiss her senseless or haul her off her horse and throttle her. All he knew was he wanted to hold her again. She had terrified him as she took off on her horse. She angered him when she stopped to taunt him before spurring her horse on again. It wasn’t because he doubted her riding skills; it was because he didn’t trust the roads to be free of highwaymen. He leapt from his horse just as Maude swept her leg over her mount. He reached up and lifted her free, his body brushing against hers as he settled her on her feet. They stood that way for a moment before Maude turned to unfasten the baskets and hand her reins to the stable master who came to greet them. It forced Kieran to step back and remind himself that he was crowding her in the courtyard of a monastery. Women were rare guests, let alone one who was on the verge of being pawed as lust thrummed through his veins.

  “Do you always take such risks? And before you tell me you’ve been riding your entire life, I mean do you always risk riding apart from your escort? You have guards assigned to you for a reason.”

  Maude looked into eyes the color of the North Sea as a storm approached. She saw hints of anger, but what she saw the most was concern. Genuine worry and perhaps fear.

  “I wouldn’t have let us get too far ahead of you. Couldn’t you tell I held back so your horse could keep up once I stopped the first time?”

  “Could keep up?” Kieran clenched his jaw to keep from snapping at her. His steed was a battle-tested warhorse, not a plow animal. His horse was among the best he’d ever seen, but Maude’s put him to shame. Loyalty to his ride kept him from accepting that hers was superior horseflesh. “Do you outpace your guards every time you ride here?”

  “No. I thought it would be fun to race. I do with my guards all the time, but I never push Trioblaid to get too far ahead. Those horses are from Sutherland, too. They keep up as well as yours did. I’m never out of sight and never more than a furlong ahead, if that.” Maude placed her hand on Kieran’s arm before she realized what she was doing. When she attempted to snatch it away, Kieran pressed it against the bunched muscles. “I was enjoying the ride, and I thought you might like to race me. Lachlan can’t help but accept the challenge whenever we ride together. You remind me of him.”

  Maude watched the darkest scowl take root across Kieran’s face, but she didn’t understand what she’d said to make matters worse.

  “I won’t race you on the way back if it bothers you that much,” she tried for a conciliatory tone.

  “I remind you of your brother.”

  “What?” Maude was confused about why Kieran latched onto that part of her explanation.

  “You said I remind you of your brother. That is not a comparison I care for.”

  Maude’s lips drew into a fine line as she tried to keep from snarling at him. She glared at him as she tried to push past him. She swung the basket on purpose so it would hit Kieran’s stomach.

  “My brother happens to be one of the finest men I ken. You should be so lucky to be considered in his company.”

  Kieran grasped her arm and almost jerked her back into place before crossing his arms. He was aware it made him appear imposing, but it was the only way to keep from wrapping them around her. The stubborn set of Maude’s jaw told him he didn’t intimidate her. He leaned forward as he had the night before to
whisper in her ear.

  “But your brother doesn’t want to do the things to you, and with you, that I do.”

  Maude’s eyes narrowed before she used her shoulder to push past him.

  “You have a cruel sense of humor. I don’t find you funny.”

  When Kieran came abreast of her, he reached for her again, but he realized she was livid.

  “Remember where we are,” she hissed. As she crossed the courtyard, Kieran watched her face relax and settle into the mask of serenity he was certain she wore every day at court. She flashed a warm smile as a monk came out to greet them. The man was tonsured, and he wore a flowing black chasuble over his white cassock and a large cross swinging against his chest with each step. His hands were tucked within his opposite sleeves. Kieran was shocked to realize how young and handsome the man was. “Father Michael, the queen sent me to request if I might impose upon your generosity and gather more herbs and medicinals. The ague swept through the castle a few sennights ago, and it depleted many of the supplies.”

  “Aye, lass. Well I know, since Brother Christian said as much when he returned. You ken you’re always welcome in our gardens, Lady Maude.”

  Maude shifted so to glance between Kieran and Father Michael, who she sensed were sizing up one another up. Kieran’s face hadn’t relaxed, while Father Michael wore a knowing expression. What he knew, Maude hadn’t a clue.

  “Father Michael, I’d introduce you to Laird Kieran MacLeod. Laird MacLeod offered to accompany me to ensure I was well protected on the road.” Maude once more smiled at the priest, and Maude thought Kieran growled, but it was too quiet to be certain. “Laird MacLeod, please meet Father Michael, the priest in charge of the herb gardens. He graciously allows me to pilfer from his garden and stored herbs whenever I need to.”

  “I’m pleased to make your acquaintance, Laird MacLeod. Perhaps you’d care to join Lady Maude’s guards in the refectory.”